This week’s show is completely off the rails (in a fun way), starting with a bear breaking into a woman’s home to steal her leftover KFC, and continuing with:

• Gangs, Teams, bear experts, and broskis.
• Brian could never have been a gay.
• In an unheard of series of events, the boys had lunch together and are going to a concert next month.
• Godsmack discussion, b/w local rock radio loved Godsmack and Local H in the mid-90s.
• Brian introduces Jeff to the Hays Code, b/w Faye Wray’s hard nipples.
• Local news is introduced to gooning; women are being attacked at Dollar General stores.
• The military clearly isn’t giving IQ tests.
• Randy Savage, candy cameras, tinfoil lenses, and Five Below.
• You’ll never guess why traffic was shut down in DC for two hours. Go on, guess. You’ll never guess.

It’s not as much of a surprise as it should be that a preacher was banging an underage boy; the plot twist is that the man of god has HIV and didn’t tell anyone. Also this week:

• James Gregory and filling up the gas tank.
• The boys debate starting a gay dating app called Pillow Biters, b/w gay sex in Nazi Germany.
• Sugar Drop grapes.
• Brian has dumped out in every bathroom at his new job.
• Jeff’s got nothing going on, except he’s planning his pre-retirement.
• Two men were arrested for having a machete fight, b/w Machete.
• Frankenstein, haunted pussies, and Elsa Lanchester.
• The Feel Good Story of the Week.
• “I Put a Spell on You.”
• A kid fell asleep on a school bus. The driver is at fault, but …
• Another kid refused to put on a seat belt, so a flight was canceled, b/w child murder.
• Light presidential election talk (1972 v. 1980, 1984).

Once again this week, more old men are getting swindled by young pussy, except this time the girl is arrested for stealing from, basically, everyone she meets. And more:

• This show really needs a gay to explain things. Not a character, but a real gay.
• The Asian noise.
• Magic Shell and the Cock Sock, b/w Marvin the Martian cock toppers.
• We finally address Jeff’s throat rattle and sniffing on the show.
• Loving old man cereals.
• Someone’s farts – or some other chemical fart spray – cleared out a Spider-Man screening.
• Redheads are back, b/w Lucille Ball had a weird face.
• Doug stepping on the host, b/w how did Frank Sinatra treat Jews?
• Tony Romo suspended “indefinitely,” b/w itchy toes.
• The Feel Good Story of the Week.
• If you were going to bang a Blizzard, what flavor would it be?
• R. Budd Dwyer